Chase Green Flags
Every relationship is different and it can be hard to tell when one isn’t healthy. Remember that you never have to settle for the bare minimum or stay in a relationship that makes you feel scared, hurt, or controlled. If you’re feeling any of that, it’s a big sign that the relationship isn’t healthy.
You deserve to be happy, safe and loved for who you are without having to change yourself.
Things that are never ok
Being controlled and told what to wear, who you see and what you do
Being pressured to do things you don't want to do
Being shouted at, put down or made to feel 'less than'
Being ignored on purpose as a way to “punish” you
Having your phone, messages, or social media checked without permission
Being threatened, pushed, grabbed, or hurt in any way
Being blamed for someone else’s actions or mood
No more people pleasing
Boundaries are your personal rules about what is and isn't ok for you. Everyone has different boundaries and in healthy relationships boundaries are respected. If someone doesn't respect your boundaries, you can protect your wellbeing by spending less time with them or stopping see them altogether.
Examples of healthy boundaries
Keeping your messages, emails and phone calls private
Not being available to reply to texts, snaps and DM's straight away
Having space when you need it, and having your own hobbies and friends
Not being pressured to do things you don't want to do, this could be sending nudes, pressuring you to have sex or to take drugs and alcohol
Consent isn't optional
Consent means that everyone is ok with what is happening. Getting someone's consent is essential, not optional. You can use FRIES to help you remember what consent looks like.
Freely given. There is no pressure or guilt.
Reversible. This means anyone can change their mind at any time.
Informed. This means they know what they are agreeing to.
Enthusiastic. This means it's a clear yes, remember that body language can tell you about consent too.
Specific. Agreeing to one thing, doesn't mean that they agree to anything else.
Online Safety Check
Protect yourself online with these tips
Think before you post. When content is posted, it can be shared widely in just seconds. It can also be saved by anyone who sees it.
Sending or receiving nudes is illegal if you are under 18. If you receive one, do not reply and let an adult that you trust know.
Don't accept friend requests or messages from strangers.
Sextortion is when someone tricks you into sending sexual images and then blackmails you. If this happens to you, it is not your fault. Tell an adult or FearFree, they can help you.
Feeling unsafe at home
Living in a home where an adult hurts, controls and frightens people is hard. It is not your fault and nothing you have done has made it happen. If this is happening to you, it's ok to reach out for help. There are people you can talk to that understand what you are going through and can help you.
What to do if you need help
You can talk to our team, or an adult you trust.
If you talk to FearFree, we will ask you questions about what is happening.
We will help you to stay safe.
If you are in danger, always call 999
