Home - Breaking the silence: why conversations are crucial in preventing suicide.

Breaking the silence: why conversations are crucial in preventing suicide.

Domestic abuse is a critical risk factor for suicide. Research shows that men and women affected by abuse are more likely than their peers to have suicidal thoughts or to take their own lives.

Being able to recognise the signs of someone in crisis and knowing how to talk to them can be the first steps in helping them to seek help.

Understanding the signs that a person is feeling suicidal

There are several risk factors that can indicate that a person is having suicidal thoughts. Warning signs to look out for include:

  • Talking about suicide, dying or self- harm e.g. “I’d be better off dead”
  • Becoming disconnected or quiet or avoiding people or social situations
  • Losing interest in hobbies or things that they used to enjoy
  • Misusing substances

Each person is different and sometimes a person will not display any of these changes in behaviour.

Why is talking to someone who is feeling suicidal important?

Talking openly and recognising how a person is feeling can help them to seek support.

You could save someone’s life by listening to them, talking with them and being present for them.

Research shows that men and women affected by abuse are more likely than their peers to have suicidal thoughts or to take their own lives.

How to talk to someone who is feeling suicidal

If you are concerned that someone needs help, you can:

  • Ask them how things are going for them and how it is making them feel
  • Let them know that you care and that you want to help them
  • Reassure them that you are available to listen to them, validate what they are saying. Reiterate what it is you think they have said
  • Offer them hope, they are not alone, you are there for them. Often someone who may be feeling suicidal just wants the painful feelings to go away or stop

What shouldn’t you say?

Being direct has been shown to help people who are feeling suicidal. Don’t ask someone who you think may be suicidal if they “are going to do anything silly?”

Where can I find help?

If you are feeling suicidal now or are worried about someone else, there is help available at

  • Samaritans UK – offering support to those in emotional crisis or experiencing suicidal ideation. Call 116 123 (24 hours a day) or visit their website: https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help/contact-samaritan/
  • Shout – a text support service for those in crisis: https://www.giveusashout.org/  Text 85258 (24 hour service).
  • First Response  Service – 0808 196 8708  puts you and your mental health first, providing a service seven days a week, 365 days a year.
  • Switchboard LGBT – a helpline for LGBT+ and “place for calm words when you need them most”. Call 0300 330 0630 or visit their website: https://switchboard.lgbt/

If you are worried someone is in immediate danger, please call 999.

Author Bio

Bel Cooper works in the Interpersonal Trauma Response Service at FearFree, providing training to GP Practices on domestic abuse and violence. She has previously worked in family support, safeguarding and domestic abuse support in the education and health sectors.

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